It's been more than a month that we have known each other. Not really a long period though. He has impressed me the way he is. I totally feel blessed whenever I am with him even though we had some quarrels at times due to different thought and mind set. We had lots of fun being with each other each time we met. We spent most of our time together at driving range together with the papa and YY. Of coz, we enjoyed learning it together. Life in this one month bring me lots of happiness and loves, what's more when the 2 elderly have been treating me like their own family.
But... Life ain't a perfect one. There's never a smooth and beautiful road path for us. After all, we have to come back to reality. I'm a divorcee with a son. I know it's not easy, & it can be tough for them to accept my past. I hurt them... Giving them so much hope, an showing them how sweet & beautiful person I am, I have definitely disappoint them with this news being pour out to them. It's cruel... Cruel to someone who have been loving me so much for the past 1 month.
He has been very determined to be with me irregardless of if there's a rejection in the family. Myself on another hand thought, do we even need to be so selfish to just live in our own world. An ocean that consist of so many beautiful lovely creatures, that I thought we still need to give our attention to.
At one hand, I really want to be with him so much. On another, I do not want to be so cruel to the elderly. Tell me about it... How should I lead my own destination. I'm confused.
Friday 2 November 2012
Monday 14 May 2012
Road map?
I took a long block leave to find back the person I am. I realized I was a little bit lost and I need a break to pull myself back.
8th of May, 2 days before the 3rd year marriage anniversary, we went to the high court in Ipoh to settle off our marriage. No more tears and sadness. Guess, both of us have finally get over it and probably the best route ever for us. We befriended again, like what we used to be before our marriage. Ain't that the best feeling, I thought.
I could not hold back my tears on the mothers' day. Received a call from my ex father in law while I was staying at my mum's office in Singapore. Without much hesitation, I picked up the call. The phone was then passed to my dearest son, Lucas. All I heard was Lucas loudly pronounced to me, "Happy Mother's Day". I was so happy and touched, hence my tears fall.
Now, should I move to a new place with new environment, leaving behind almost everything in the country? It's a choice that I probably not only need to think twice but to think thousand times. A decision that I should not regret, I should be happy with.
Yes, this holiday did not really bring me to find who I am, but rather allow me to learn to choose a route of my life. I need a road map of life, if there's one.
-Moving on TC-
8th of May, 2 days before the 3rd year marriage anniversary, we went to the high court in Ipoh to settle off our marriage. No more tears and sadness. Guess, both of us have finally get over it and probably the best route ever for us. We befriended again, like what we used to be before our marriage. Ain't that the best feeling, I thought.
I could not hold back my tears on the mothers' day. Received a call from my ex father in law while I was staying at my mum's office in Singapore. Without much hesitation, I picked up the call. The phone was then passed to my dearest son, Lucas. All I heard was Lucas loudly pronounced to me, "Happy Mother's Day". I was so happy and touched, hence my tears fall.
Now, should I move to a new place with new environment, leaving behind almost everything in the country? It's a choice that I probably not only need to think twice but to think thousand times. A decision that I should not regret, I should be happy with.
Yes, this holiday did not really bring me to find who I am, but rather allow me to learn to choose a route of my life. I need a road map of life, if there's one.
-Moving on TC-
Saturday 21 April 2012
Another chapter
Cheers to another new chapter.
-Moving On TC-
Thursday 19 April 2012
11 hours to go
sitting on the sky lounge at his home, accompany by a can of heineken, counting down for another 11 hours, and yet hoping for a miracle to come. The question is, do I really want a miracle or I'm just too emotional at this moment. I'm confused.
I broke down in the room, and I could not stop bursting out my tears. heartache. It was the real pain. Painful.
Was just craving for a tight hug. But, I was all alone. I felt insecure, indecisive. Should I make a U turn? but again I wonder if there's even a choice for me to choose?
Now, I thought to myself, life will be better. Be strong. When tomorrow comes and I looked back, I will smile and be gladful for the decision I made. I know I can walk through this dirty, yucky path. The road gonna turn out to be smooth, and beautiful with greeneries and flowers all over. My ocean gonna fill with all the beautiful lovely creatures. Say, it gonna be a better day!
-Moving On TC-
I broke down in the room, and I could not stop bursting out my tears. heartache. It was the real pain. Painful.
Was just craving for a tight hug. But, I was all alone. I felt insecure, indecisive. Should I make a U turn? but again I wonder if there's even a choice for me to choose?
Now, I thought to myself, life will be better. Be strong. When tomorrow comes and I looked back, I will smile and be gladful for the decision I made. I know I can walk through this dirty, yucky path. The road gonna turn out to be smooth, and beautiful with greeneries and flowers all over. My ocean gonna fill with all the beautiful lovely creatures. Say, it gonna be a better day!
-Moving On TC-
Sunday 1 April 2012
Welcome to TC Ocean
Yes, I started this blog on April Fool 2012. No joke! I name this site as TC Ocean. Hoping that I will grow this ocean and may this ocean continue to grow to be the most beautiful place in my life.
I decided to jot down on this ocean, because I thought time flies too fast. 1st quarter has passed. I wish to recall on what I have done and do not wish time flies just as is it.
Lying down on my bed, looking out through the window are kids running around the compound accompany by the beautiful landscape. Fresh wind blowing in with music playing at background by my micro hi-fi, while writing this by using my Sony Vaio, I feel totally blessed & relax. Thanks god!
TC Ocean will share with you my philosophy of life, my happy & unhappy moments.
I personally thought life is about decision making. I've finally make a legal decision last weekend. I was heavy hearted, I cried. But nothing could stop me though. A decision that will bring another brand new status to me. Nothing much I can do to make things turn around, thus accepting the fact and moving on with open heart.
-blessed TC-
I decided to jot down on this ocean, because I thought time flies too fast. 1st quarter has passed. I wish to recall on what I have done and do not wish time flies just as is it.
Lying down on my bed, looking out through the window are kids running around the compound accompany by the beautiful landscape. Fresh wind blowing in with music playing at background by my micro hi-fi, while writing this by using my Sony Vaio, I feel totally blessed & relax. Thanks god!
TC Ocean will share with you my philosophy of life, my happy & unhappy moments.
I personally thought life is about decision making. I've finally make a legal decision last weekend. I was heavy hearted, I cried. But nothing could stop me though. A decision that will bring another brand new status to me. Nothing much I can do to make things turn around, thus accepting the fact and moving on with open heart.
-blessed TC-
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